So I've been a Zombie for about 3 weeks now....I Love it! I do all my own Stunts. Ever since my mate Stuart pushed me out a window I've had a few problems walking, but other then that I feel Great! I'm out every night seeing friends for a bite to eat. Getting Shot, you know 'The Usual'
But being a Zombie doesn't pay the bills, so I'm thinking about doing some stand up comedy. Hope the jokes aren't too silly for you -
1. Hey Honey, I went into Zombie town to get that Shampoo you like. Cost me 'an arm and a leg!'
2. People say I've got my Mother's eyes... but I ate them
3. I tell ya, if I knew there was going to be a Zombie Apocalpse I would have surrounded my house in Treadmills
4. Just fed up of my Zombie girlfriend moaning all the time... pass me the shot gun.
5. Did you hear about the Dyslexic zombie... he ate my Brian
6. My Zombie Girlfriend jumps on me, every night when I come back from eating people. All she wants is Sex Sex Sex. I'm soooo tired and I just can't help dropping off now and then
7. What did the Zombie do after he dumped his Girlfriend... Wiped his Butt!
8. Met up with a cute Zombie girl the other night - she was all over me. Crazy! Next thing you know she's cooking me Legs for breakfast
Fin
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